Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
