just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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