Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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