I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
