when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
