Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i will never coherently bang her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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