Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I need a burrito and a hug.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Randomize
