I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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