Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
