I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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