I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
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