Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
