If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Randomize
