Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
There's always time for handjobs
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
