dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
my poor anus
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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