We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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