Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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