oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
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