If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize