Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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