We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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