you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
