I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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