We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
