I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
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