I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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