Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
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