i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
