I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better