Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing. http://tfl.nu/g19l
  Replies (21) Good night (1692) Bad night (3984)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club http://tfl.nu/ouuf
  Replies (1) Good night (1182) Bad night (538)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book. http://tfl.nu/rwum
  Replies (44) Good night (881) Bad night (10499)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting." http://tfl.nu/dhfp
  Replies (27) Good night (4188) Bad night (2071)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus. http://tfl.nu/scm8
  Replies (17) Good night (7713) Bad night (1246)
• Favorite

  (478): View more from Georgia

  I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (478): I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths. http://tfl.nu/2srv
  Replies (38) Good night (10567) Bad night (2173)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt. http://tfl.nu/f1ui
  Replies (10) Good night (3205) Bad night (931)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal. http://tfl.nu/2rsl
  Replies (6) Good night (1662) Bad night (1158)
• Favorite

  (779): View more from Illinois

  I smell like gasoline and adventure.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (779): I smell like gasoline and adventure. http://tfl.nu/rkdf
  Replies (18) Good night (2572) Bad night (722)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper?? http://tfl.nu/82gs
  Replies (6) Good night (1652) Bad night (609)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake. http://tfl.nu/fynu
  Replies (8) Good night (677) Bad night (882)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (316): You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form. http://tfl.nu/cz7h
  Replies (1) Good night (670) Bad night (409)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (337): You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness. http://tfl.nu/kvta
  Replies (3) Good night (1579) Bad night (389)
• Favorite

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  Cheese only

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (606): Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort. (606): Cheese only http://tfl.nu/r3u9
  Replies (5) Good night (928) Bad night (300)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right? http://tfl.nu/vsli
  Replies (7) Good night (390) Bad night (740)

Randomize