we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Less talking, more tequila
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize