i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
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