Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
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