Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
