Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
