I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
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