She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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