Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
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