I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
