I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize