Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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