a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
