Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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