so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
