bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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