Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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