She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
