You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
