I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
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