i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
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