his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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