fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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