420 ftw
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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